Tuesday, February 9, 2010

Celebrity Spotted. No, wait. It's Just Kal.

I'll write this as Kal would- as an interview. Enjoy.


KoK: "Yes, it's true. I did see Kal Korff on the street."

Interviewer: "Wow, that must have been pretty fucking exciting for you!!"

KoK: "Um, I said it was Kal Korff."

Interviewer: "Okay, right. Sorry. Rewind the tape. Let's start again."

------------------------------------------



Interviewer: "So, sir, tell us about your recent encounter."

KoK: "Well, I bumped into Kal Korff on the street yesterday afternoon."

Interviewer: "Interesting. Tell us more."

KoK: Well, it was around 3:30pm. I had an appointment in Prague 2 (a district of Prague). I came out of I.P. Pavlova metro, walked over to catch the next tram one stop to Namesti Miru. While at the tram stop, I found myself staring at this guy. It hits me - that's Kal Korff."

Interviewer: "And how did you feel?"

KoK: "Kind of dirty, kind of like I was staring at a traffic accident."

Interviewer: "Come now, be nice. How did Kal look to you? What was he wearing?"

KoK: "He's taller than I would have expected, maybe 5' 8" at best. Had on some beatup black & white sneakers, a rather drab purple winter coat. I did note it was especially purple for a man to wear, but that doesn't matter much to me."

Interviewer: "Anything else to tell?"

KoK: "Well, being my first time seeing him up close - I didn't dare get closer than 10 feet - he didn't look well. Maybe he's ill these days, who knows. His face looked haggard and worried. His eyes darted around like he was half-expecting someone to surprise him. To be honest, I felt a sense of embarrassment for him, like you do when you stare at a homeless guy."

Interviewer: "Was he carrying anything?"

KoK: "Oh yes. He had with him a bag of bread. That also reminded me of a homeless guy since it's common here for broke people to just eat bread rolls."

Interviewer: "So, did you follow him?"

KoK: "Well, not on purpose, but we both got on the next tram that came. It was the number 4. As I said, I went only as far as Namesti Miru. Kal continued on, down Francouzsk√° street. Who knows where he went. And who cares really."

Interviewer: "Well...thanks, I guess."

16 comments:

We.Are.Kult.Of.Kal said...

Guys, sorry for being away for a while.

No travels or anything...I'm just a bit tired of this blog. Sure, it's fun to harp on the guy, because he so deserves it. But he's a waste of my time. Waste of our time.

It's ironic that the only thing that keeps me going, so to speak, is Kal himself. When Kal accused David Biedny of this blog and the Facebook impersonation, that made me laugh. When Kal claimed the police are in hot pursuit to come arrest me, that got me excited.

But now, it's quiet. Again. Boring and quiet.

Come on, Kal. Toss out a new video or a new threat. Hell, bring on a couple of each.

We.Are.Kult.Of.Kal said...

I also want to say a few words to Paul in this public forum...

I tip my (Boston Redsox) hat to you, sir, for opening up about the "Worlds Away" hoax. I know every one can understand that a little shared deception was well worth the sheer panic given to Kal.

And lastly, for your loss, Paul, I keep my hat off and hold it to my heart. Sorry.



You are, and always will be, the hero of this story, Paul. Keep up the good (legit, honest and hard) work.

Paul Kimball said...

I prefer the term "practical joke" to "hoax," although I'm sure KK wouldn't understand or appreciate the difference. If nothing else, it amused Mac and I, and a couple of others we let in on it as we went along, so it was all worthwhile, even if there was no grand denouement. :-)

Jimmy D said...

Kult - we dig what you're saying, but this blog is important.

Perhaps you could decide only to post stuff on, say, the first and third Sunday of every month (unless anything noteworthy sprung up). That would cut down your workload, and it'd mean that folks like me wouldn't feel the need to check in at least once a day just on the off-chance....

Jimmy D said...

I've often fantasized about what I'd do if I ever ran across the nutjob in a similar situation.

I'd love to simply beat the living crap out of him, but that'd be sinking to his level and might get me in jail.

I think I'd conduct a running gonzo journalism-style interview with him using my mobile phone to film and record.

"Colonel Korff - are you really conducting nanobot operations against al-Quaeda strongholds in Pakistan and Afghanistan, as you have claimed on your website?"

"Colonel - whatever happened to the al-Queda operatives whom you claimed (on your website) to have rounded up in Germany two years ago? Has their case come to trial?"

"Colonel - what news of the expert BBC panel ... of which you claimed on your website to be chairman ... formed to scrutinize the Americans' plans for a missile defence shield?"

"Colonel - or may I call you 'KalIsrael' - what happened to the new Czech newspaper that you said was due to debut round about now and whose editorial chair you claimed you would fill?"


etc.

etc.

I doubt I'd simply let him go on his way unmolested, though.

Shame on you, Kult!!!

We.Are.Kult.Of.Kal said...

Paul - true enough. Thanks for chiming in.



JimmyD, you're hilarious, buddy.

I got a few words about letting Kal "go on his way unmolested." - I admit, it crossed my mind a few times to just go up and ask him "What the fuck is wrong with you?"

I could also have asked him the kinds of interview questions you gave, which is to call him on his BS.

In any case, though, I had neither a camera nor a buddy in case it got ugly.

I saw him and his face. Even on the street in obscurity, the man looked half-scared. He's standing there anonymously in public and looking worried.

Since my childhood, I have made it a point not to corner scared animals.

Kal may read this post & the comments. He'll know I recognized him. He has no chance to recognize me. I'm just another body standing on the corner. And I may again today, tomorrow or any day. Sleep well kernel.

Jimmy D said...

Just one more thing, Kalvin, if you're reading this (and I know you are).

The fact that you are as mad as a hatter is obvious - and I am not ordinarily one to laugh at mental illness.

But the fact is that - on top of that - you are a very nasty guy. And you'd still be a nasty guy even if you somehow managed to regain your marbles.

Speaking personally, the thing that turned my pity of you into sheeer, molten loathing was your treatment of V*tech S*dl*cek. You duped and humiliated this fine, gentle, generous man and (as far as he is concerned) robbed him of his honor.

M*chaela Koc*s, Milos "Fuck You" Bartu and your many other victims are one thing. But your behaviour towards Mr S. was another step down on the moral scale.

Apologize publically, unequivocally and completely for your treatment of him and I, for one, will leave you alone.

Anonymous said...

"Apologize publically, unequivocally and completely for your treatment of him and I, for one, will leave you alone."

Whoa - JimmyD throws down the gauntlet!
The challenge is cast!!

What do you say, kernel - all it takes is one public apology from you. And then one of your adversaries leaves you alone.

Kernel?

Sqwonk-0-matic said...

Wanted to repeat something here I posted at the good old KKIA blog. I was doing some reading about the fabulous Mel's Hole hoax that inevitably led me to some Art Bell nonsense that inevitably led me to Royce's Ufowatchdog website's absolutely incredible expose on the "Dr. Jonathan Reed" hoax. I had never read it all before and am really, really impressed by how much work Royce put into that. He's also reformatted the whole site and whatever snarky comments I may have made in the past about its appearance are hereby swallowed. He obviously put a LOT of work into the makeover and its a much stronger web presence for it. Good work, Royce!!

Anonymous said...

So where is new the Czech newspaper, turd worm? You know - the one you promised would be out this month ... the one you said you'd be editor of? Simple question. Can we have a simple answer?

See: http://www.kalkorff.com/home/the-news/676-breaking-news-its-official-col-kal-korff-becomes-editor-of-new-czech-daily-newspaper.html

Jimmy D said...

Just been looking at your latest posting, "Colonel" (http://www.kalkorff.com/home/the-news/706-exclusive-meet-taliban-qleaderq-jalaluddin-haqani-rapist-and-pornographer-qin-the-name-of-islamq.html)

God knows where you dredged this up from. It is not your own investigative work (as you hint it to be). And the fact that you have replicated it on your own website (after much salivating on your part) does not constitute proof that you are a compassionate guy who respects and honors women (as you would like to believe).

Rather, this is proof positive that you are irredeemable vermin. God help you if I ever run across you on the streets of Prague.

Anonymous said...

RMIII sold off that site some time ago. I helped him out in large part putting the Reed case and shutting up Sean David Morton… down. Lotta time, effort and money was spent but we did get somewhere.

Sadly, there are plenty of people on Youtube, etc., who still believe the Reed case. I discussed it with a few of them and I gave up.

One is born ever minute. RMIII, myself and a few others squarely brushed aside Reed and Morton. In Reeds case, people will believe anything, in Morton’s case, he has changed his ever changing resume and he's not invited to UFO con's anymore.

All good.

FN

Anonymous said...

Dear World,

As many of you know, recently, a self-confessed Jew hater and also prick (to be polite about this issue), who uses the screen name of "Jimmy D," (you will be able to read our exposes of him in the near future in a new series of videos, as well as view footage which was recently taken of this person at their residence and elsewhere), created a PHONY Facebook account and Web site using my name.

This individual, who is an admitted "obsessed" stalker and hater, according to their own emails, who has been stalking me for the past few years, also impersonated me and stole my identity, which of course are also crimes.

This hater and stalker is now being investigated by more than one police entity, since both the Czechs and Americans and Israelis are involved because of my mixed nationality as a foreigner and because I have held security clearances and am also a Jew.

Anti-Semitism is not only a crime, it is a crime against humanity. This is true whenever anyone is "hated" just because they exist.

Last Tuesday evening, I spent two hours with Czech police turning over all the emails and threats we have ever received from this person, as well as video taken of this hater entering and leaving their residence and walking about which was filmed during the past few months.

When we met with the police (since I was with several people who are witnesses), we were shown various postings by this individual on the Internet, reprinted on some UFO-related Web sites which have been Xposed as frauds by UFO WatchCat, and we CONFIRMED that this person is THE SAME one who is now of interest to the police.

Although I have said before that I will never get a Facebook account, and never had any intention to, I have changed my mind for one reason: In today's world, to help expedite meeting new people and making new friends, you CANNOT ignore Facebook and other such entities.


We also made the police investigators VERY AWARE of WHO and WHICH Web sites TOLERATE and make a point to SPREAD hate-filled and violence advocating posts, or allow such postings to be published, which makes them liable. The police AGREE that these events are not "unrelated" and that they indicate a much larger, broader and more extensive problem which is also now being investigated.

Over time, and at a place and time and event of OUR choosing, some of these Web sites and forums will also be contacted by police as investigators take their time to meticulously wade through what has been as much as four YEARS of messages and past blogs, advocating hatred, intolerance and violence, not to mention the usual (for them) libel, slander and defamation made with deliberate, malicious intent.

Some people, just don't like MYTHS like the "911" CONspiracy, JFK CONspiracy, the Meier UFO cult, Roswell, the phony "Bigfoot" Patterson film of 1967, Global warming bullshit; Barack Obama, Nancy Pelosi and Harry Reid Xposed, etc.

Too bad.

If you wish to become "friends" on Facebook with UFO WatchCat or myself, as Kal Korff, please feel free to contact me.

Unless you make a point to hate, everyone is invited.

THANKS AGAIN FOR ALL OF YOUR SUPPORT and for the 200+ emails we have received from all of you during the past four months CONDEMNING the individual who has been criminally stalking me and THANKS for also providing personal information on this bozo, their occupation, home address, etc.

We have passed all of this info onto the proper authorities, and as they told me last Tuesday, "We will do this right, not in a hurry, time is on our side."

Of course, the police are right.

Jimmy D said...

"Colonel" (or perhaps I might call you "KalIsrael"...),

Might I remind you that you are wanted by the Czech police for your swindling of Mr. S*dl*c*k and Milos "Fuck You" Bartu.

The first thing the cops would do if you ever showed up at the station would be to clap you in irons.

You madman.

The Unknown Korffer said...

What a great fantasy piece! Classic REVERSAL techniques by which a harasser/stalker tries to evoke proxy recruitment by accusing their victim of being the harasser/stalker. You have some more reading to do on the Exposing Online Predators blog that exposed you as a cyberpath, Kal, if you intend trying to fool anybody into thinking you are an innocent bystander here.

The 2nd thing that any police agency would do after reading a known con artist their rights would advise the alleged stalking victim to break off all contact with their harasser immediately. Which would include going on the internet and making up some dramatic, wordy post for a message board that will essentially serve as an open threat. So either little Kalvin in his make believe army man uniform is LYING once again or he totally disregarded anything Czech police may have advised him of in regards to what he alleges above. In any event he'll never be able to delete or edit that post, and its lies are as transparent as saran wrap.

Udderly vial and pathetic, just like all things Kal K. Korff. Speaking of which, how's that PHD thesis coming?

Jimmy D said...

Oh, and by the way, "Colonel" - when have I ever "confessed" to being a "Jew hater"? You mad, lying piece of shit...?

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